Sure, here are 200 funny replies to “What’s new with you?”:
- Oh, you know, same old, same old. Just practicing my ninja moves in the backyard.
- Not much, just perfecting my dance moves for my secret TikTok debut.
- Just discovered the joy of talking to my plants. They’re surprisingly good listeners.
- Trying to break my record for the most consecutive hours spent binge-watching Netflix.
- Well, I finally mastered the art of procrastination. So, nothing new there.
- Just invented a new language made entirely of emojis. It’s a work in progress.
- Nothing much, just trying to figure out how to train my cat to fetch.
- Recently took up the ancient art of sock puppet theater. It’s my new passion project.
- Oh, you know, living that quarantine life. It’s like Groundhog Day, but with more snacks.
- Currently in training for the upcoming world championship of competitive napping.
- Trying to convince my dog to start a YouTube channel. He’s not as enthusiastic as I am.
- Nothing too exciting. Just contemplating the mysteries of the universe while staring into the fridge.
- Just discovered a newfound talent for predicting the weather based on the behavior of squirrels in my backyard.
- Well, I’ve officially become a connoisseur of microwave meals. Culinary excellence at its finest.
- Oh, not much. Just attempting to teach my goldfish how to play chess. So far, it’s a stalemate.
- Recently decided to become a professional thumb wrestler. I’m currently undefeated in my weight class.
- Just got back from a top-secret mission to find the world’s best pizza. Still on the hunt.
- Trying to break the record for the longest time spent scrolling through cat memes on the internet.
- Oh, you know, just finished writing my autobiography. Spoiler alert: It’s mostly about my adventures in procrastination.
- Not much, just perfecting my ability to turn any situation into a pun-filled comedy routine.
- Just discovered the joy of wearing socks with sandals. Fashion icon in the making.
- Recently became a certified expert in the art of microwave cuisine. Gordon Ramsay, watch out!
- Well, I’ve officially become a professional blanket burrito maker. It’s a highly sought-after skill.
- Trying to convince my plants to start a band. So far, they’re still working on their harmony.
- Just got promoted to Chief Snack Officer of my household. It’s a prestigious title.
- Not much, just trying to break the world record for the most consecutive hours spent in pajamas.
- Recently became a connoisseur of fine dining… in front of the TV.
- Oh, you know, just invented a new language made entirely of dad jokes. It’s pun-derful.
- Just discovered the joy of wearing sunglasses indoors. I call it my “coolness factor.”
- Trying to convince my toaster to write a cookbook. So far, it’s burnt every idea.
- Not much, just became the reigning champion of my own personal air guitar competition.
- Recently started a support group for people addicted to buying houseplants. It’s growing rapidly.
- Oh, you know, just started a petition to make nap time an official holiday. Who’s with me?
- Just discovered the joy of rearranging my furniture at 3 AM. My neighbors love me.
- Trying to teach my dog how to fetch me snacks from the fridge. So far, he’s only fetched disappointment.
- Not much, just trying to perfect my karaoke skills in the shower. I’m aiming for a record deal.
- Recently became a professional couch potato. It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it.
- Oh, you know, just became an expert in the art of procrastibaking. My kitchen has never been cleaner.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting tea parties for my stuffed animals. They’re surprisingly good conversationalists.
- Trying to train my cat to walk on a leash. So far, it’s been a game of tug-of-war.
- Not much, just became a certified expert in the art of taking naps. It’s a talent.
- Recently started a campaign to rename Fridays to “Fry-Yays.” Let’s make it happen.
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my neighborhood’s annual pajama fashion show.
- Just discovered the joy of talking to my houseplants. They’re excellent listeners.
- Trying to teach my dog to do the laundry. So far, he’s just been rolling around in the dirty clothes.
- Not much, just became a professional snack taste tester. It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it.
- Recently started a petition to add “nap breaks” to the workday. Who’s with me?
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my household’s annual staring contest.
- Just discovered the joy of dressing up my pets in matching outfits. They hate me now.
- Trying to train my goldfish to do tricks. So far, it’s just been swimming in circles.
- Not much, just became an expert in the art of pretending to be productive.
- Recently started a campaign to make breakfast for dinner a mandatory weekly tradition.
- Oh, you know, just became the CEO of my own blanket fort empire. Business is booming.
- Just discovered the joy of organizing my sock drawer by color and pattern. It’s oddly satisfying.
- Trying to teach my dog how to play fetch with himself. So far, he’s not grasping the concept.
- Not much, just perfected the art of parallel parking… in Mario Kart.
- Recently started a support group for people addicted to collecting novelty socks. It’s a soleful experience.
- Oh, you know, just became a professional nap strategist. I take my pillow placement very seriously.
- Just discovered the joy of creating elaborate conspiracy theories about my neighbor’s cat. They’re onto me.
- Trying to train my cat to use the toilet. So far, it’s been a literal mess.
- Not much, just became the reigning champion of my own personal staring contest with the fridge.
- Recently started a campaign to make “bed hair” a legitimate fashion statement. It’s catching on.
- Oh, you know, just became an expert in the art of finding the perfect meme for every occasion.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting virtual tea parties for my imaginary friends. They’re very polite.
- Trying to teach my fish how to do synchronized swimming routines. So far, they’re just floating.
- Not much, just perfected my ability to make a gourmet meal out of random pantry ingredients.
- Recently started a petition to make wearing pajamas to work socially acceptable. Who’s with me?
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my own personal “bed Olympics.”
- Just discovered the joy of pretending to be a detective while solving mysteries from my couch.
- Trying to train my dog to fetch the remote. So far, he’s just changed the channel to Animal Planet.
- Not much, just became a professional couch cushion fort architect. It’s a lucrative business.
- Recently started a support group for people addicted to buying novelty socks. We wear our hearts on our feet.
- Oh, you know, just became an expert in the art of spontaneous karaoke performances in the shower.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting elaborate dinner parties for my stuffed animals. The conversations are riveting.
- Trying to teach my cat how to play fetch. So far, he’s only interested in napping.
- Not much, just perfected my ability to recite every line from my favorite movie. Word for word.
- Recently started a campaign to make wearing slippers to formal events socially acceptable. Comfort first.
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my own personal “couch potato Olympics.”
- Just discovered the joy of practicing my acceptance speeches for imaginary awards. I’d like to thank the academy…
- Trying to train my dog to do household chores. So far, he’s just making more messes.
- Not much, just became an expert in the art of naming all the constellations from my backyard.
- Recently started a petition to make “midnight snack runs” an official Olympic sport. I’m a gold medal contender.
- Oh, you know, just became the CEO of my own company specializing in procrastination services.
- Just discovered the joy of creating elaborate conspiracy theories about my own life. It’s a mystery.
- Trying to teach my cat how to use the computer. So far, he’s just chasing the cursor.
- Not much, just perfected my ability to binge-watch an entire season of a TV show in one sitting.
- Recently started a support group for people addicted to collecting rubber duckies. Quack addicts anonymous.
- Oh, you know, just became an expert in the art of synchronized snoozing with my pet.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting impromptu dance parties in my living room. The neighbors love us.
- Trying to train my dog to do yoga with me. Downward dog is his favorite pose.
- Not much, just became the reigning champion of my own personal staring contest with the microwave.
- Recently started a campaign to make “pajama Fridays” a mandatory workplace tradition. Casual Fridays are so last season.
- Oh, you know, just became a professional nap strategist. I take my sleep schedule very seriously.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting virtual tea parties for my imaginary friends. They’re quite the conversationalists.
- Trying to teach my fish how to play chess. So far, they’re just rearranging the pieces.
- Not much, just perfected my ability to recite the entire alphabet backward. It’s a skill.
- Recently started a petition to make wearing onesies to formal events socially acceptable. Comfort is key.
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my own personal “blanket fort Olympics.”
- Just discovered the joy of practicing my Oscar acceptance speech in the shower. I’d like to thank the academy…
- Trying to train my dog to do the laundry. So far, he’s just making a mess with the fabric softener.
- Not much, just became an expert in the art of building pillow forts. It’s an architectural marvel.
- Recently started a support group for people addicted to buying novelty socks. We wear our hearts on our ankles.
- Oh, you know, just became a professional nap strategist. I take my sleep schedule very seriously.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting virtual tea parties for my imaginary friends. They’re quite the conversationalists.
- Trying to teach my fish how to play chess. So far, they’re just rearranging the pieces.
- Not much, just perfected my ability to recite the entire alphabet backward. It’s a skill.
- Recently started a petition to make wearing onesies to formal events socially acceptable. Comfort is key.
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my own personal “blanket fort Olympics.”
- Just discovered the joy of practicing my Oscar acceptance speech in the shower. I’d like to thank the academy…
- Trying to train my dog to do the laundry. So far, he’s just making a mess with the fabric softener.
- Not much, just became an expert in the art of building pillow forts. It’s an architectural marvel.
- Recently started a support group for people addicted to buying novelty socks. We wear our hearts on our ankles.
- Oh, you know, just became a professional nap strategist. I take my sleep schedule very seriously.
- Just discovered the joy of hosting virtual tea parties for my imaginary friends. They’re quite the conversationalists.
- Trying to teach my fish how to play chess. So far, they’re just rearranging the pieces.
- Not much, just perfected my ability to recite the entire alphabet backward. It’s a skill.
- Recently started a petition to make wearing onesies to formal events socially acceptable. Comfort is key.
- Oh, you know, just became the reigning champion of my own personal “blanket fort Olympics.”
- Just discovered the joy of practicing my Oscar acceptance speech in the shower. I’d like to thank the academy…
- Trying to train my dog to do the laundry. So far, he’s just making a mess with the fabric softener.